I hired a professional editor (who was amazing) to review my novel manuscript in March. I then made edits based on her suggestions and sent the revised manuscript to beta readers over the summer. This week I am working on edits based on their comments. I looked for people who I trust who are readers. I asked them to read with an eye toward story. Did they like the characters? Did the story engage them? Was there anything confusing? Also, if they are into grammar, feel free to edit away. Now I am looking for themes in their comments and deciding what to change and what to keep the same. Editing is not my favorite task, but I understand the value and importance.
I expect this is the same for all writers, but my writing feels very personal to me. The words on the page are a part of me, a part of me that I might not be able to express in any other way. Writing always make me feel vulnerable. I tell myself that is what makes it worth doing. If it isn’t a little bit scary, am I really putting myself in the work? So when I receive edits, suggestions for changes, or suggestions about things that just don’t work, it does sting a bit. Even though I asked for it. I believe I put my best work out there and then to find out there are things people don’t understand or think should be cut entirely hits me hard.
But I am finding a way through by feeling my feelings, but not dwelling on it. I can feel bummed out for a day or two and then I need to let it go and focus on what drives me to write in the first place. I believe this is something all writers need to figure out for themselves because rejection is a part of writing. There are plenty of books, essays and poems by other writers that do not resonate with me; they are not for me. And that is okay too.
I got another rejection on Tuesday for a Writing Retreat, my third time applying. It was a lovely rejection email. There were nearly 1,000 applications for about 60 spots, so just looking at the numbers it makes sense. Doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting. And I will try again next year.
What has come to me is that I am not for everyone, for every reader, for every contest, for every writing retreat. And that is okay. I will find my readers. I will find my contests. I will find my writing retreat. And if I really think about it, I have found readers who love this story and this newsletter. I have published work in several places online and in professional archival spaces. I have created my own writing retreat at a friend’s casita in New Mexico. Those are the things I need to remember when I am hit with the sting of rejection. I can make my own path and find what I am meant to find.
Well said, Mary. It’s got to be hard to handle the no’s, the turndowns, and deep edits on your work. Keep writing!