My least favorite part of doing research is having to re-do a search. When researchers would come into the research room and say “last time you found me X file, I’d like to see it again.” I would always ask if they noted the file title or database file number - something that would help us find it again. Often times there would be only a vague reference or description of what they remembered. Just as often that memory did not lead to the record in question.
Why is it so hard the second time around? I can hear you asking that question. Shouldn’t it be just like the first time, but maybe even faster since we already know it exists. You would think that but I don’t find that to be true. It is always harder because our memories are fallible. We think we remember the title or the date or the general gist of the document or photo, but we are just off enough to not produce the right result. Knowing that it exists ends up just taunting me and, if I am honest, irritating the shit out of me.
As I have mentioned before, searching for information is fun for me. My brain thrives on the creative challenge of thinking of search terms and non-linear ways to navigate archival records. There is a flow and a rhythm that is highly satisfying for me. However, trying to recreate the search and missing the mark, is that much more frustrating.
Here is an example - I wanted to write about an archival record about a deer path. I know what I want to say about my experience with a researcher and this particular record. I want to reference the actual record, so I have been looking in Efiles (the City’s online database), I have Googled it and tried to figure out if there is another name for the record. The first time I looked for it over 6 years ago, it took a bit of time because I needed to figure out if it was a real thing, how it might have been described in the 1960s and what it might be called in the database. I was so pleased when I finally came up with a record to meet this researchers need. I know this record exists and I cannot find it now and it is super frustrating for me.
I am trying not to become compulsive in looking for the record but it is a struggle. My last resort is to ask my friend who was present at the time and has a great memory for this kind of detail. But there is a large part of me that wants to find it on my own. The part of me yearning for the satisfaction that can only come after intense searching. I will keep you posted on my progress.